its my choice to keep lying..
Monday, October 31, 2005 7:21 PM
i used to have a fantasy..
i dun mind being lied by it..
its beautiful and i continued my path down myself..
though its all fake,
though i made up everything..
though i noe i'm nothing to them..
aNd though its a nightmare..
it'll always be my sweetest dreams..
its only den when u knocked on my door..u came in without any signals..even without my permission..u tried to wake me up, snap me out of it..i'm blured, i'm blinded by tos past tat i believed u..u ar lyk always there fer me..its only den tat i started walking down wif u..u made many beautiful pictures in my memories..u seemed to have already planned out everything fer me..but still i dun noe why..even if u ar rite hereeven if u assured me wif your words, your existance..i'm safe wif u yet i'm insecure in part of me...i noe i shouldn't have allowed u to enter..its all my fault..theres no way can i let them go..even if u are the kindest ppleven if i wan to forget, i wan to let go..i noe i cant...
i'll still grab hold of it tightly, i wont let go... i dun wan to..i noe tis since frm the beginningand i should have realised it earlierif they are still hereif i can still rmb themi'm willingly rmb them till the end..even if it last for months fer years.. i dun mind.its lyk tats the only thing tat i can do fer them, i cant repay them..nev, i wont be able t repay them..all the happy memories and tos tat they've gOne fer us.i can only promised tat i wont 4get..i cant allow some else to enter to replace them... atleast allow me to do tis as a form of punishment or gift..sorrybut now..aft all tat u've gOne fer me... i'm sorry, i cant promise u anything..our agreement..i noe u tried really hard to keep wad u've promised me..but its jux tati woke up earlier frm tis dream den ui noe i'm not suited fer u.and u shouldn't be the one for me.theres no future for us to walk downits me who couldn't promise u anything..now everything has been reversedi'm breaking our agreement..i've let u down..i broke your heart..i couldn't do anything at your lowest moments...but theres something tat i can assure u.u asked me.im afraidafraid tat u'll affect my decisions..but thenthe ans isu ar always my bro..but u are much more important den a bro...someone really important.i cant lose u and i wanna be wif u always.but i dun think i can...tats why, just let me go too..i knowtat someday u'll read tis..i hope tat u can rmb us..i'll always be ur best caring mei xpand u'll always be mii lamest gor..atleast if i cant accept it, u'll still noe it.. i really enjoyed the days before our agreementwhen we ar only gor meii hope tat it wont be changed
if u need me, i'll be here...___find your own happiness...cOx i cant give u any..__its mii choice to keep lying.. i no need anyone to save me.
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